Register Only Page?

I'm trying to allow users to register only--that is, create a username and password and nothing more. I DO NOT want them to have any sort of product associated with them, not even a "free" one. I simply want them to be able to register.

My reasons for this are a little complex--I want to be able to offer a membership that has free extra time built in, but only for new signups. I have another membership without the extra time for users who have canceled or expired and want to re-join; I don't want them to get the extra time again. I also have information that is only for people who simply register. I need to be able to display some products to those who do not have a subscription (signup) and different products to those who DO have subscriptions (members). The display options treat users with "free" product subscriptions as members with subscriptions and so the distinction becomes effectively useless if I make all my members have the "free" product by default--they are all seen by aMember as being "members" when in fact they are just registered with a user/pass and have not paid anything.

So that's the long story. The problem is, how do I tweak the signup page so that:
a) there is no error for not having a subscription type selected
b) you are not forwarded to the cc info page
c) no subscription is actually added to the person's account

Essentially, I want a "registration only" page and all payment and subscribing to take place within the members area.

Thanks to anyone who has insight on this. I have a support request in to Alex as well, but just in case he's called it a night...

why dummy product doesn't serve purpose

The dummy product would work, but it also means I can't then sort products by "signup only" and "members"; everyone is already a member, so the distinciton is useless. I need one more way to sort them out.

There is the "require one of the following products" option, but that doesn't work for me either. I need a way to show products to people who have "none of the following"; so if you don't have it, you will see it. If you do have it, you don't see it.

How can I do that? With so many ways to sort things, I was sure there would be a way, but now I'm not sure...or I need someone else's fresh perspective.